Fourth Round Upset

If any of you had me losing to the universe in the March Madness relationship tournament… congratulations. You’ve won. Allow me to play “One Shitty Moment” while you snip away the tattered remains of my love life.

Oh, it’s not really that dramatic, don’t worry. I can be around sharps. 

Yes, you finally get to hear the end of the Rick Saga, because it has reached its end. Yesterday I messaged him asking for a conversation and he called me five minutes after he read it. Much was said, but the upshot is that he thought he was ready to date, but he isn’t, and he’s so overwhelmed emotionally that he hasn’t been able to deal with his life beyond work. He’s thrown himself into the job to distract himself from everything else. Duh. And he’s so uncertain about what he wants for his personal life that he’s even wondered whether leaving The Ex was the right decision. He doesn’t know whether to move into a new place or move back in with her. 

So, yeah.

That was really the only part of the conversation that surprised me, or any of you, probably, if you’ve been playing our game at home. Of course, that doesn’t mean that I slept well or that I don’t have sort of epically puffed-up eyes from crying myself to sleep. I really hate that particular feature of crying myself to sleep, by the way. Like insult really needs to be added to injury at that point. My eyes are assholes.

It was a long and honest conversation during which we agreed that there will be no hard feelings or awkwardness if the university ever fucking calls me and offers me the goddamned job. He says he’s truly excited about me getting it (allegedly) and looks forward to having a friendly face around that he can vent to sometimes. At which point I fell silent, because after approximately seven eons of dating and two years-long, particularly cruel bouts of unrequited love, I have finally realized I can’t be “friends” with someone I’ve been interested in. But I didn’t need to say that out loud at this point. 

I’m still waiting for my Cinderella story. But I’m seriously, seriously considering quitting the game and taking up competitive eating instead.


23 thoughts on “Fourth Round Upset

  1. I’m sorry that’s how it worked out, but I’m glad he was honest and finally talked to you about it. Seems to me he’s going through fairly normal stuff after coming out of a long term serious relationship. Sucks that he didn’t wait longer to persue a relationship with you in the first place, though.

    The whole thing sucks really, but that’s dating for you. At least he came clean now and not six months from now. Or longer.

  2. Hugs. I kind of expected that, but I am so glad you two talked, and that he was man enough to tell you now. Though it would have been nice if he had figured that out before you started dating. I am rooting for you in the romance department. After my last devastating break-up, I was considering never dating again, or just marrying for money and staying drunk all the time. But I did find love. So it can happen. And after a bout of nighttime crying, my eyes always look like the losers in a title fight too.

    • Thank you for the hugs. He told me he was going to wait a couple more weeks until things with work calmed down before he would talk with me, which I wasn’t thrilled with and he now realizes the error of that line of thinking.

      I had never thought of marrying for money and staying drunk. Hmmm. Must consider.

  3. Ewww, to him thinking about moving back in with the ex. Just ewww. Hey, my eyes are assholes too and somehow turning 41 this year immediately put them into full-time asshole mode, no crying required. It’s awesome.

    • Haven’t believed in that theory for a long time, though I think we can make good things come out of less-than-good things. I’ve had plenty of freedom, and the good news is: none of the top five female competitive eaters in the world are overweight. Not even a little bit!

  4. I’m so sorry to hear this. Personally, I was a single mom for eons with one broken relationship after another. I was finally resolved to just be happy with me and pretty sure I’d be alone. Then I met a guy I had went to school with and he asked me out to dinner, now I can’t scrape him off with a spatula … LOL

    Now if I could get the thought of Rick being in a pirate bed, constipated.

      • Haha! I don’t want to punish him. I really don’t. I think he’s really hurting and confused. And honestly – having to sleep in a pirate bed at your parents’ house at the age of 35 is punishment enough, no?

  5. Yes, I would agree that is punishment enough. I’m just wondering, does he have siblings, because beware if he does. My sibling would sneak in, take a picture of me drooling in the pirate bed and send said pic to everyone … LOL

    • Yup. He has a brother and a sister. His brother currently lives at home, too. Sister is married with a little boy. Hence the pirate bed – it’s his room when he visits and spends the night. Suffice it to say Rick has not been comfortable with his usual sleeping habits since splitting up with his ex.

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