Things You Can Do When You’ve Finished Grad School

After three years, a lot of academic crap, and some very, very intense times, apparently I am now permitted to say I have a master’s degree. (The actual degree is meant to be mailed to me in July, but I have the nice folder thingy they give out to master’s degree recipients at commencement and my unofficial transcript as evidence of things not seen.)

So now that that’s over, I have been struck time and time again by the things I am suddenly able to do, just free as I please. To wit:

  1. Breathe regular
  2. Read for fun. Take no notes.
  3. Buy too many books to read for fun; immediately become overwhelmed by sense of obligation to read for fun due to muscle memory of last three years (OMG, I have to read 100 pages tonight after work…)
  4. Fold laundry
  5. Clean the house
  6. Stare at a wall
  7. Navel-gaze (Sigh… I did not miss this…)
  8. Date
  9. Grow despondent (select topic)
  10. Watch television. Complain that there’s nothing on.
  11. Write for fun
  12. Go out. Do things. With other people, even.
  13. Say yes
  14. Have mild anxiety attacks about having too much free time
  15. Go grocery shopping when needed (no more meals made entirely of condiments!)
  16. Suddenly sit straight up, thinking, I have to find research articles for…! Wait, no, I don’t. Sit back. Return biometrics to resting levels.
  17. Stop constantly mentally reviewing schedule (Okay, if I leave work and sit in the parking lot for an hour before rehearsal, I can study during that time, and then if I get home from rehearsal before 10:30, I can probably read an article and get those notes done…)
  18. Spend an entire Saturday on the internet. Wrestle with self-loathing re: same.
  19. Google “large Victorian house on private beach wraparound porch free rent.” Fantasize accordingly.
  20. Resist propensity for in-text citation